Bcoz I need to write something.

Hello guys,

Hey! It's December already! But I only have two entry for this year. hahahaha. the Earth spinning too fast maybe until I doesn't get to catch up with all these things so called blog. hahaha. but as usual. as I doesn't have anyone to chit chat with. so I'll write. hehe. instantly, I'm with someone. that somenone's name is Maslie bin Abdul Malik. he called himself as Mr Slay. so automatically I become Mrs Slay. hahaha. and as the trend now. we also have our own hashtag which is #MrMrsSlay . almost same like Mr and Mrs Smith isn't it? hahaha.

we've been together for juuust 9 months only. baru sangat. hehe. alhamdulillah i'm happy with him. He is happy with me. but yeah. sometimes we do fight like the other couples did. like now. hahahaha. that is why I'm writing right now. I just want to express about how I feel towards him. I do love him so much. I love the way we manage our relationship if there is any problem. we'll discuss it like the adults. solve the problem together. try to find time and space to think about each other mistakes. I hope this relationship will be last forever since I think that both of us can handle our problems nicely so far. hahaha. I don't know about the future. but I hope it will remain the same.

the thing is we just have to accept each other strength and weakness. if I make a mistake so I'll ask for an apology and he'll do the same thing. but this is the real world laa kan. of course I felt hurt when we had a fight. hahaha. I can't laa fight with him. it really kills me inside. wuuu. i hope things will get better soon right now. hee. here is our picture together. just to introduce him to my blog world. heeeee :)

This picture was taken when we were in matriculation. first picture together. strictly as friends only. 2011. hee

Recently, this second picture was stolen from his facebook with the caption "sebab kalau buat2 comel telampau mainstream" hahahahaha

Thank you for your presence in my life. You make me happy and I appreciate that :)

Aku tekad!

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.

Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarokatuh semua fellow friends.

Hi! Hi! Si fazleeayu ne namanya, mulai hari ini berazam. InshaAllah. Dengan nama Allah ingin merubah kehidupan sungguh2 untuk lebih maju ke hadapan. InshaAllah. Aminn. Dengan ada nya spirit, semangat macam gini. InshaAllah. Minta2 Allah permudahkan jalan yang aku pilih ne. Niat paling utama is bantu keluarga. Sooner, I will join satu bisnes yang aku rasa yakin boleh merubah kehidupan aku lepas ne dengan syarat aku usaha dan istiqamah untuk terus berusaha. I will never ever give up once I join this bussiness. I already set my own goal. Tinggal mau buat ja lagi. BUT! I will also not going to abaikan my study. InshaAllah I will finish my degree jugak. Amin. Dengan izin Allah. Aku yakin aku boleh. Sebab aku tau I can do better and better and better! Yang penting USAHA DOA DAN TAWAKAL. Saya tidak boleh malas malas. Tidak boleh! Tabouleh. Hahahaha. Eh. Serius. Serious talk. Serius mau jadi lebih baik. Allah suka kalau orang berusaha. Allah akan bantu. Walau apa pun cara nya. InshaAllah Aku yakin :)

What am I gonna say? You make me feel this way.

Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarokatuh ~~

Hi semuaaaa. Happy Chinese New Year to all those yang celebrate it! Haaa. Kalau aku update belog adalah tu cerita yang terbuku di kalbu kan. tiada tempat mau cerita. hmm. cerita di sini seja lahh. The truth is I feel sad. huaaa TnT

Ada lelaki yang aku suka tuu. Hmm. Nda tau macam mana mau cerita baa. Astagaaaa. Hahaha. Maluu. Aku telebih perasan kot. Kami ada ber wasap2 baru baru ne. Asal wasap sama dia konfem aku akan guling2 ketawa. Hahahaha. Ahh that feeling! Sementara sejaa. Dia baik baa. Tapi aku kot yang over react over response sampai dia mungkin terannoyed dengan perangai ku. Besides, aku tahu taste nya tinggi. Tinggi gila sebab dia pun memang bukan sembarangan punya orang. I thought that he love me too ba actually. Tapi macam tidak seja tu. Hahaha. Aku seja ne yang perasan. Hmm sedih nyaa. I tabouleh laa kalau tengok nama nya di wasap, terus rasa mau wasap dia. Tapi  sumpah aku rasa aku mengganggu dia kalau aq wasap dia. Aku nda tau kenapa aku bole berperasaan begitu. Mungkin sebab memang aku ne mengacau dia. Tapi dia perna cakap juga kacau seja. Dia punya hp pun sunyi seja selalu. Tapi bila aku wasap dia, aku pla yang rasa nda selesa. Apa kah? Huuu. Love is so complicated!

Tapi nda apa lah. Sempat aku rasa fall in love balik sekejap. Sekejap! It’s okay you. Aku nda akan teruskan ne perasaan cos maybe you want someone else in your life. And it is not me. Let me teruskan ja kehidupan ne sebagai orang yang single mingle smigel hahahahaha. After almost a year. Fuhh. Aku pun nda sedar juga. Tik tok tik tok hampir setahun suda gua menyingle. Wuaaaa *clap hand* hahahaha. Cerita lama jangan di kenang. Aku sudah move on! Walaupun semalam aku nampak diorang dating. Hahahaha. I don’t actually nampak diorang laa. Tapi tertengok keretanya seja. Pedulik eh! Hahahaha. Lantak kamu lah sana. Afa afa fun dari kita saja ba ituuu. Wuhuuu. F this feeling. Aaaaahh. Nda suka nya aku begini.

Aku tau laa aku manusia biasa juga. Manusiaa. Yang boleh sukak orang, jatuh cinta, getting hurt whatsoever. But I surely will get up back whenever I fall down. Macam sekarang ne lah. Masi berusaha untuk cari semangat balik. Should I just forget about him? Unfollow everything? Or how? Aaaa. I can’t even think about what I am supposed to do! Love is so confusing. Aaaahh. Meroyan aku di buat nya. Tidaaaaakkk! Aku mau unfollow tapi nda sanggup. Aku mau dia! Hahaha. Hey wake up wake up ayu! Wake up Fiona! Dia tidak mahu kau. Hahahahaha. Okay foine -.-‘

Okay setakat itu sahaja curhat saya. Goodbye. Have a nice day. Oh ya. Happy Chinese New Year :D

Bertekad cemerlang :D

Assalamualaikum guys :D

Fuhh. Baru selesai siapkan esaimen. Rasa best. Setelah 5 semester. Ini kali la aku rasa betul2 bersemangat mau buat esaimen. Hahahaha. Macam tipu ja kan. Tapi macam betul la juga. Sebab aku pun nda tau laa. Hahaha. Aku mau betul kasi naik pointer ku. Sangat2 mau. Aku tau aku boleh. AKU BOLEH! Tapi selama ne aku buat apa? Sukaaaa tangguh2 kerja. Nda belajar betul2. Bemain sejaaa. Nda perna suda buat latihan. Buat homework pun tiru orang kadang kadang. Kalau mau quiz or test or exam. Esok hari kejadian, satu malam sebelum tu baru mau buka buku. Ehh. Sangat tidak bagus. Sangat tidak menjanjikan pointer yang bagus. 

So form now onwards. Beberapa minggu sebelum final exam ne. aku mau start study suda betul2. BETUL BETUL yaa bukan pura pura. Hahaha. Ini kali lah aku mau study awal. Kalau sem sebelum ne. memang awal sem tu aku cakap lah kan aku mau belajar awal. Tup tupp. Sama juga. Always study at the last laaast minute. Erghhh. Cannot be this time. Cannot! I must study earlier. MUST. Haaa. Gituu. inshaaAllah. Doa kan saya yaa kawan2. Hahaha. Saya mau ba betul2 tu dekan. Kalau possible mau first class. Kasi bangga ummie sama abah. Memang lah orang cakap pointer tinggi nda semestinya itu lah ini lah. Tapi kan emm. Suka hati aku lah kan mau aim pointer berapa sekali pun. Hahaha. 

inshaaAllah I will be more deteremine from this moment. See? Now. I just finished doing my 2 assignments. Terus rasa ringan. Rasa lega. Rasa puas sebab dapat siapkan esaimen awal. Mudah mudahan laa semua ne boleh berterusan. Istiqomah. InshaaAllah. Best nya study! Best nya be positive! I like to be like this. Full of positive aura. Haaa gituu. Hahahaha. inshaaAllah boleh jadi role model ngan adik2 ku yang tersayang sekalian. I ada empat orang adik uols. Haa. Mau tak mau jadi a good role model. Mesti lah perlu kan. Selain itu, ehhh. Macam buat esaimen pulak dah luahan perasaan kali ne. hahaha. I think that’s all. Saja nak update blog. Bagi bakar lagi semangat nak study for the exam. inshaAllah. 

Dengan izin Allah. Mudah2an pointer saya meletops sem ne dan sem sem akan datang. Aminnnnn :D

lots of love from me :*

Everything will be fine :)

Kesedaran dan Pengakuan

Assalamualaikum semuaa :D

Hai Haloo. Lain pulak suda mood ku sekarang. Ada cer ne ada cer. Okay. Before that aku mau bagitau lagi. Biar lah banyak kali. Nda bole juga lari dari kenyataan. Aku realize something semalam lepas aku hangout with my senior. Dia ada nasihat aku. Dia cakap begini “kalau lelaki tu betul2 sayang dengan kau. Perkataan busy tu tiada tu” haaa. Nampak tak di situ. Betapa buta nya aku selama ne. hahahaha. Why no one tell me about this before this? Tapi syukur Alhamdulillah juga laa my sis yang memang berpengalaman dalam cinta cintun ne bagi tau aku semalam. Come on. Simple thing. Kenapa lah aku nda terfikir? Hahaha. Sebab dibutakan oleh cinta kali ya. Cinta haktuikk. Hahahaha. Memang paling bodoh suda diri ku ku rasa. Baahhh. Aku mau cakap lagi yang aku memang TAK PATUT tunggu dia lagi. Biar kan lah dia dengan labu2 nya. Sukak hati nya lah mau buat apa suda. Hahaha.

Oke next story mory. Adui lucuu. Hahaha. Begini ceritanya. Ada dulu kan time di KML kan. Matrik Labuan. Kawan ku si Maharani, dia kasi tengok aku satu lelaki ne. dia cakap lelaki tu comel. Jadi aku tengok la. Memang comel. Hahaha. Start from that day baruu aku notice keberadaan nya di KML. Hahaha. Punya lucuuu. Rupanya dia pun sebelum aku kenal dia lagi dia kenal aku suda. Selalu juga tengok2 aku. Ehh. Perasan ka apa ne. tapi betul. Dia bagi tau aku sendiri. Hahahaha. Dia kenal aku time kami ber’Glee’2 d sana KML. Ada pertandingan. He mention about aku nyanyi lagu Rumour Has It. hahahaha. Lawak nyaa. Dia ingat kunun aku nyanyi tu lagu. Dia sukaa. Aigoo. Hahahaha. Lepas tu kan lepas tu kan. Lepas dari aku kenal dia dari Maha tu. Ada la kami telimpas time bekeliaran di KML tu. Hahahah. Lol. Aku kan direct punya orang. Aku ‘Hi’ la dia. Trus excited. Astagaa. Hahaha. Malu juga la. Tapi sebelum ne biasa suda kan hai2 orang. So biar lah. Peduli apa. Hahaha. Lepas tu kan. Kali kedua kami belimpas. Dia lagi yang ‘hai’ aku dulu. Naa. Punya la aku melompat dalam hati. Di hai oleh orang comel. Hahahahaha. ‘hai ayu’. Ohemjii. Hahahaha. Naaa kan. Punya laa aku terobek kenangan silam.

Baru ba juga dia mengaku dia pun suka tengok aku dulu. Sebab aku upload cover aku nyanyi lagu distance di fb. Trus semalam dia wish goodnight. Ehh. Lama suda dia nda wasap. Tiba2 ada. Naaa. Heran sekejap. Rupanya sebab mau give a comment about the cover that I made last night. Yawww. Hahaha. Okay nampak tak yeksaited di situ. Hmmm. Lol. Nanti bulan satu dia balik sini Sabah. Kami mau duet kunun buat cover lagu. Di Kundasang. Sambil buat video klip. Ehh. Hahahahaha. Kilik. Oke lahh. Itu sajaa cerita saya. Nanti kita cerita lagi yaa. Saya ne kadang rajin kadang malas mau update belog. Hmm. Kalau ada cerita tu. Ada mood. Ada la tu entry baru. Kalau xda. Berhabuk lah jawabnya belog ne. hahaha. Kepada readers semua. Thankyou sebab luang mas abaca cerita kehidupan suka duka nangis tawa gurau senda. Hmm. Hahahahahaha. Thanks a lot :D

Have a nice day !

WHY?

CAUTION! This entry might contain harsh word due to the unstable feeling of the writer. Thank you.

Assalamualaikum dan salam satu Malaysia.

Hahahaha. Okay. I wanna ask. Why do you come back here again after I decided to put you aside? Why? That is the first one. 

Secondly. Why do you come back again and go again and come again and disappear again? Why? This is seriously and totally madness for me. I’m the one who going to be mad. Ohmai. I’m so stress !!! please don’t give me that kind of hope. Please I beg you. Yes, to be true I really in to you. That doesn’t mean you can treat me suka hati kau jaa. I’m a human being. Of course I strongly don’t want to put any hope in our relay anymore. But I’m only a human being. The feel of hope is still here. In my heart. Even my minds deny it. like soooo much I really don’t want it. but my heart still hoping. Hoping for us to be like the old time. 

Thirdly, why do you treat me like that? Why do you treat me like we were used to be when we still in relay? What the f*uck with all of this drama that you made? Are trying to play a “game” on me? Please boy. Enough. I’m hurt enough. Please don’t hurt me more. I think I can’t bear it anymore. I’m so fed up with this entire thing. I feel like ‘I AM THE DUMBEST HUMAN EVER ON EARTH”!!! for still hoping a guy like you. Don’t you have any sense of humor? Hello? I’m your ex-girlfriend okay. You don’t need to treat me like I’m still your girl anymore. I’m not. And me? The dumbest human ever. I don’t know how to say about this anymore.  Why? Kenapa? Why I still hoping? Arghhhhh :’( ohmaii. I can’t. I can’t live like this or else I’m gonna get crazy. Seriously. Almost every day since he approach me back, I got headache. Keep on thinking about our relay. Why he come again after so much month he doesn’t contact me at all. At all !! then suddenly he come and acting like nothing happen. Ya Allah I beg you, make me forget all this feeling towards him. I really want my old life back. F*uck this feeling ! I hate it to be hurt. 

Last but not least. WHY? Why the guy that I love hurt me the most? WHY?

*crying*

I think...I just think...

Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarokatuh ~

Hello Sunday! Yes. Just saying. Banyak yang tersimpan dalam kepala hotak and yet perlu untuk ditulis dalam sini. Firstly, a man shouldn’t be too harsh on women because they got soft heart actually. Even they may be seem a lil harsh outside. But believe me, when it comes to inside. It is so soft so gent what so ever. Ehh. Hahahaha. Yes but it’s true. Aku pernah mengalaminya sendiri. Lelaki tu ingat aku ne nda sensentap (sensitif+sentap) ka? Hahaha. I do feel sensitive juga ba. Tapi tu lah. Your action make me don’t want to be so close as before anymore. Because you hurt me. Ehh. Hahaha. Not that hurt la actually. Maybe I can forget it by the mean of time. Lol. Just don’t be too harsh on me okay. But in other view, I think the women also harsh ba juga sometimes. I’ve experienced it too. But this time, the man is the one who have soft hearted. Hahaha. Actually it was me yang buat that guy merajuk. Tacing! Hahahaha. I didn’t mean it actually. But he terasa with my words. I do it repeatedly until he can’t bear it. I feel sorry and funny at same time. I was just jokes around with him but I never know that guy also can get touch so easily like that. After almost three days only then he forgave me after I apologize 3 times from him. Nasib baik dia maafkan. Kalau tidak, putus kawanlah jawab nya. Hahahaha. Evil me huh? Miahahaha *evil laugh*

Another confession or opinion from my view is I think I don’t trust man love anymore. I think most of it is trash. Hahaha. They only know and sooooo professional in expressing sweet word. Most of them is a sweet talker only. Ya. Maybe my confession sounds so stereotype but this is my opinion. I don’t trust man’s love for now. As I had experience before, they only know to say that “I can’t live without you” and so on so forth. But actually they didn’t mean it pun. I told you because I have gone through that so-called sweet moment. Puikk! Hahahaha. I prefer just to be friends with the guys. So that they don’t hurt me like the old ancient time hurt me. Hahahaha. Its hurt you know. Like the sword swung on your heart soooo many times. How you gonna heal that? Tell me. Hahaha. Just let the times heal the pains. We all deserve to be happy. Don’t torture yourself to wait for someone who doesn’t want you. They all trash. They maybe didn’t even see how much effort that you had put on just to be with them. Wahh. Kejam gila aku cakap men ne trash. Hahaha. It is not all of the man la kan. Some of them is good, some of them is bad and some of them is separuh2. That’s life. You just need to be clever enough to find someone who suits you the most. They don’t need to be perfect because no one is perfect. Learn to love someone like All of Me by John Legend song. “Love your curve and all your edges, all your perfect imperfection”. Wahh gitu! Hahaha. In short, all people are the same. Have good and bad side. Be wise in choosing your life partner. Hmmm. Macam pro ja aku becakap dari tadi kan. Hahahaha. Till we met again in the next entry. Have a nice sunny Sunday day ! hahh panjang jela2 engkau. hahaha. Minta maaf kepada sesiapa yang terasa dengan entry ne. I'm so sorry. This is just my own opinion and thanks for reading fellas. 

Xoxo :D