Bertekad cemerlang :D

Assalamualaikum guys :D

Fuhh. Baru selesai siapkan esaimen. Rasa best. Setelah 5 semester. Ini kali la aku rasa betul2 bersemangat mau buat esaimen. Hahahaha. Macam tipu ja kan. Tapi macam betul la juga. Sebab aku pun nda tau laa. Hahaha. Aku mau betul kasi naik pointer ku. Sangat2 mau. Aku tau aku boleh. AKU BOLEH! Tapi selama ne aku buat apa? Sukaaaa tangguh2 kerja. Nda belajar betul2. Bemain sejaaa. Nda perna suda buat latihan. Buat homework pun tiru orang kadang kadang. Kalau mau quiz or test or exam. Esok hari kejadian, satu malam sebelum tu baru mau buka buku. Ehh. Sangat tidak bagus. Sangat tidak menjanjikan pointer yang bagus. 

So form now onwards. Beberapa minggu sebelum final exam ne. aku mau start study suda betul2. BETUL BETUL yaa bukan pura pura. Hahaha. Ini kali lah aku mau study awal. Kalau sem sebelum ne. memang awal sem tu aku cakap lah kan aku mau belajar awal. Tup tupp. Sama juga. Always study at the last laaast minute. Erghhh. Cannot be this time. Cannot! I must study earlier. MUST. Haaa. Gituu. inshaaAllah. Doa kan saya yaa kawan2. Hahaha. Saya mau ba betul2 tu dekan. Kalau possible mau first class. Kasi bangga ummie sama abah. Memang lah orang cakap pointer tinggi nda semestinya itu lah ini lah. Tapi kan emm. Suka hati aku lah kan mau aim pointer berapa sekali pun. Hahaha. 

inshaaAllah I will be more deteremine from this moment. See? Now. I just finished doing my 2 assignments. Terus rasa ringan. Rasa lega. Rasa puas sebab dapat siapkan esaimen awal. Mudah mudahan laa semua ne boleh berterusan. Istiqomah. InshaaAllah. Best nya study! Best nya be positive! I like to be like this. Full of positive aura. Haaa gituu. Hahahaha. inshaaAllah boleh jadi role model ngan adik2 ku yang tersayang sekalian. I ada empat orang adik uols. Haa. Mau tak mau jadi a good role model. Mesti lah perlu kan. Selain itu, ehhh. Macam buat esaimen pulak dah luahan perasaan kali ne. hahaha. I think that’s all. Saja nak update blog. Bagi bakar lagi semangat nak study for the exam. inshaAllah. 

Dengan izin Allah. Mudah2an pointer saya meletops sem ne dan sem sem akan datang. Aminnnnn :D

lots of love from me :*

Everything will be fine :)

Kesedaran dan Pengakuan

Assalamualaikum semuaa :D

Hai Haloo. Lain pulak suda mood ku sekarang. Ada cer ne ada cer. Okay. Before that aku mau bagitau lagi. Biar lah banyak kali. Nda bole juga lari dari kenyataan. Aku realize something semalam lepas aku hangout with my senior. Dia ada nasihat aku. Dia cakap begini “kalau lelaki tu betul2 sayang dengan kau. Perkataan busy tu tiada tu” haaa. Nampak tak di situ. Betapa buta nya aku selama ne. hahahaha. Why no one tell me about this before this? Tapi syukur Alhamdulillah juga laa my sis yang memang berpengalaman dalam cinta cintun ne bagi tau aku semalam. Come on. Simple thing. Kenapa lah aku nda terfikir? Hahaha. Sebab dibutakan oleh cinta kali ya. Cinta haktuikk. Hahahaha. Memang paling bodoh suda diri ku ku rasa. Baahhh. Aku mau cakap lagi yang aku memang TAK PATUT tunggu dia lagi. Biar kan lah dia dengan labu2 nya. Sukak hati nya lah mau buat apa suda. Hahaha.

Oke next story mory. Adui lucuu. Hahaha. Begini ceritanya. Ada dulu kan time di KML kan. Matrik Labuan. Kawan ku si Maharani, dia kasi tengok aku satu lelaki ne. dia cakap lelaki tu comel. Jadi aku tengok la. Memang comel. Hahaha. Start from that day baruu aku notice keberadaan nya di KML. Hahaha. Punya lucuuu. Rupanya dia pun sebelum aku kenal dia lagi dia kenal aku suda. Selalu juga tengok2 aku. Ehh. Perasan ka apa ne. tapi betul. Dia bagi tau aku sendiri. Hahahaha. Dia kenal aku time kami ber’Glee’2 d sana KML. Ada pertandingan. He mention about aku nyanyi lagu Rumour Has It. hahahaha. Lawak nyaa. Dia ingat kunun aku nyanyi tu lagu. Dia sukaa. Aigoo. Hahahaha. Lepas tu kan lepas tu kan. Lepas dari aku kenal dia dari Maha tu. Ada la kami telimpas time bekeliaran di KML tu. Hahahah. Lol. Aku kan direct punya orang. Aku ‘Hi’ la dia. Trus excited. Astagaa. Hahaha. Malu juga la. Tapi sebelum ne biasa suda kan hai2 orang. So biar lah. Peduli apa. Hahaha. Lepas tu kan. Kali kedua kami belimpas. Dia lagi yang ‘hai’ aku dulu. Naa. Punya la aku melompat dalam hati. Di hai oleh orang comel. Hahahahaha. ‘hai ayu’. Ohemjii. Hahahaha. Naaa kan. Punya laa aku terobek kenangan silam.

Baru ba juga dia mengaku dia pun suka tengok aku dulu. Sebab aku upload cover aku nyanyi lagu distance di fb. Trus semalam dia wish goodnight. Ehh. Lama suda dia nda wasap. Tiba2 ada. Naaa. Heran sekejap. Rupanya sebab mau give a comment about the cover that I made last night. Yawww. Hahaha. Okay nampak tak yeksaited di situ. Hmmm. Lol. Nanti bulan satu dia balik sini Sabah. Kami mau duet kunun buat cover lagu. Di Kundasang. Sambil buat video klip. Ehh. Hahahahaha. Kilik. Oke lahh. Itu sajaa cerita saya. Nanti kita cerita lagi yaa. Saya ne kadang rajin kadang malas mau update belog. Hmm. Kalau ada cerita tu. Ada mood. Ada la tu entry baru. Kalau xda. Berhabuk lah jawabnya belog ne. hahaha. Kepada readers semua. Thankyou sebab luang mas abaca cerita kehidupan suka duka nangis tawa gurau senda. Hmm. Hahahahahaha. Thanks a lot :D

Have a nice day !

WHY?

CAUTION! This entry might contain harsh word due to the unstable feeling of the writer. Thank you.

Assalamualaikum dan salam satu Malaysia.

Hahahaha. Okay. I wanna ask. Why do you come back here again after I decided to put you aside? Why? That is the first one. 

Secondly. Why do you come back again and go again and come again and disappear again? Why? This is seriously and totally madness for me. I’m the one who going to be mad. Ohmai. I’m so stress !!! please don’t give me that kind of hope. Please I beg you. Yes, to be true I really in to you. That doesn’t mean you can treat me suka hati kau jaa. I’m a human being. Of course I strongly don’t want to put any hope in our relay anymore. But I’m only a human being. The feel of hope is still here. In my heart. Even my minds deny it. like soooo much I really don’t want it. but my heart still hoping. Hoping for us to be like the old time. 

Thirdly, why do you treat me like that? Why do you treat me like we were used to be when we still in relay? What the f*uck with all of this drama that you made? Are trying to play a “game” on me? Please boy. Enough. I’m hurt enough. Please don’t hurt me more. I think I can’t bear it anymore. I’m so fed up with this entire thing. I feel like ‘I AM THE DUMBEST HUMAN EVER ON EARTH”!!! for still hoping a guy like you. Don’t you have any sense of humor? Hello? I’m your ex-girlfriend okay. You don’t need to treat me like I’m still your girl anymore. I’m not. And me? The dumbest human ever. I don’t know how to say about this anymore.  Why? Kenapa? Why I still hoping? Arghhhhh :’( ohmaii. I can’t. I can’t live like this or else I’m gonna get crazy. Seriously. Almost every day since he approach me back, I got headache. Keep on thinking about our relay. Why he come again after so much month he doesn’t contact me at all. At all !! then suddenly he come and acting like nothing happen. Ya Allah I beg you, make me forget all this feeling towards him. I really want my old life back. F*uck this feeling ! I hate it to be hurt. 

Last but not least. WHY? Why the guy that I love hurt me the most? WHY?

*crying*